Story for the Week
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When you’re sliding into first and your pants begin to burst….”
If you’ve seen the movie Parenthood, you know what comes next in young Kevin Buckman’s song. Disgusting, smelly, and just a normal part of everyday life, poop is funny in anyย conversation with a kid. And if you’re talking about poop with an adult…. Well it’s probably still funny.
Don’t believe me? A quick search for “poop” in the Books section of Amazon populates more than 10,000 results. More than 3,000 of those are listed under Humor & Entertainment. And with the birth of the poop emoji in 2010, poop for entertainment purposes took on a life of its ownโpillows, Halloween costumes, slippers, dog toys that actually make noise, blankets, balloons, and even (maybe the most disturbing of all) a bag of brown cotton candy called Original Bag of Poo with the tagline “Freshness You Can Taste.” (Yes, really.)
Poop is funny, and it’s especially funny in the story of Andy Bellows who we first meet as he discovers and downloads an app called HowUPooing. Andy’s story is a work of fiction, so the app doesn’t really exist, but I bet that you could probably find something similar because there really is an app for everything. But if you find yourself looking for it, you probably need to follow Andy’s detox program because, even though poop is funny, we really don’t need an app for that.
Book Review
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4 Stars for Logging Off by Nick Spalding
314 pages
Publisher: Lake Union Publishing
Publication Date: April 23, 2020
I received an advance copy of this title from NetGalley and Lake Union Publishing.
Publisher’s Description
Andy Bellows is in a right state. Plagued with insomnia, anxiety and neck ache, heโs convinced thereโs something seriously wrong with him. And the worst thing is that his doctor agrees. The diagnosis: Andy is in the grip of a self-destructive addiction to technologyโhe just cannot put that bloody mobile phone down.
Texting, tweeting, gaming and online datingโtechnology rules Andyโs life. His phone even monitors his bowel movements. So how will he cope when heโs forced to follow doctorโs orders and step away from all of his beloved screens?
From having to leave the flat in search of food like some kind of Neanderthal to engaging in conversations with actual people, Andyโs about to discover just how bewilderingโand scaryโthe analogue world can be. And when his sixty-day detox hits the headlinesโmaking him a hero to suffering technophiles everywhereโAndy is sorely tempted to pack it all in and escape in the nearest Uber.
Can he get himself out of this mess, and work out how to live a better, technologically balanced lifeโฆwithout consulting Google even once?
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Nick Spaldingโs Logging Off is one of those books that I had to think about for a couple of days before I reviewed it. For me, it wasnโt โlaugh-out-loudโ funny and I had a hard time figuring out why Andy Bellows is sooooo obsessed with his poop, but the book did make me smile and shake my head a lot ๐คฆโโ๏ธ, and I really liked the ending.
In a world where access to information is instantaneous, where thereโs an app for everything, I have found myself many times wondering why we all spend so much time with our faces in our devices and trying to remember how we got anything accomplished before the rise of the Internet. (And yes, I absolutely see the irony of posting this review on a blog that will be shared on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram after having read a digital copy of the book on my Kindle.) We have become so connected through our devices that we have disconnected from the world around us, and Andy Bellows is feeling the physical consequences of being a slave to his digital addiction.
Andyโs doctor recommends a digital detox, and yes itโs a real thing. What this book details is Andyโs difficult attempt to log off. The results are downright ridiculous, but the point is to demonstrate how dependent we are on technology. I mean, does anyone get a phone book anymore to look up the number of the local pizza place?
Andy clearly would have given up the fight if it werenโt for his friend Fergus writing an article (or two or three) about Andyโs detox. Fergus basically made Andy the figurehead of the local digital detox movement, and Andy, a major introvert, didnโt like it one bit.
This is a fun read. Itโs heartwarming at times, and a bit gross at times because of Andyโs focus on his poop. The more I think about it, the more Andy reminds me of Greg Heffley from Jeff Kinneyโs Diary of a Wimpy Kid series, just all grown up and still getting himself into really bizarre situations.ย
All in all, not a bad way to spend some quarantine time. ๐
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